Regain your Confidence

April 27, 2011

Do you remember your first day at high school? I do. My uniform was like my armour. In my mind I shouted "here I am, look at me full of confidence" but as soon as I walked through the school gates and saw lots of people dressed exactly like me I instantly started to compare myself with others and lost confidence.

Do you feel like that when you walk into a room full of other business owners? Do you feel like that when you have your first meeting with a new client? Good, that's perfectly natural.

Here are a few useful tips to help you regain your confidence:

Lesson 1 - Life isn't all about you

I'm sorry it's true! The sooner you learn this lesson the happier you will be.

Generally, and especially in business, people are not that interested in you unless they feel you can benefit them in someway. Whilst others in the room are being self absorbed use your time wisely and ask them questions about themselves; their business; any concerns they have; etc. and store this information away.

Lesson 2 - God gave you two ears and one mouth for a reason

When you ask questions really listen to the answer. Not many people are good at this.

Make notes if you are in a meeting, or jot down notes straight after a networking event, recording as much information as you can about people you have met.

Analyse this information and think how you can help them. Do you have a product or service to meet their needs, can you refer them to someone else, perhaps you have some useful information back at your office that could help them.

When others feel that you have listened to them and you want to help them they will naturally refer you to others or contact you themselves when they have a need for your product/service.

Lesson 3 - Find inspiring competition or role models

When comparing yourself to others do so in a positive way. Make a mental note of your differences. If you are better than your competitors "great!".... if not consider how you can improve by using their experience to get you to a better place. Find an inspiring role model and determine what makes them so good. How do they walk, talk, move, etc. there's no point in reinventing the wheel - if someone is doing a good job just do what they do!

Lesson 4 - Be the best you can be

As long as you are doing the best you can you should be delighted with your achievements. Don't waste your time and energy beating yourself up about all the things you messed up, or haven't achieved - it's pointless and self defeating. It's good to aspire to better things but don't forget to congratulate yourself on what you have achieve to date and be truly thankful for what you have now.

If a fellow isn't thankful for what he's got, he isn't likely to be thankful for what he's going to get. ~ Frank A. Clark

Here’s to your continued success!